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If you own a cat (or cats), the chances are that you might never have to give them a bath, particularly if they have short hair or live indoors.  But there are times when the need to bathe your cats cannot be avoided – for example, they might come home one night covered in some kind of mystery substance from who-knows-where, or they might have loose stools that get matted up in their fur near their tail (especially if they have long hair).  

If your cat needs a bath, then you can either take it to a local pet grooming service, though for many cats the stress of going in a cat carrier and in the car is greater than any stress that could be caused by being given a bath at home.  And that’s your alternative, of course – to give your cat a bath at home. 

If you’re really well-prepared, then you will have given your cat or cats baths when they were kittens, to get them accustomed to being washed. Few people do this, though, so if you’re reading this having discovered something unknown or undesirable in your cats’ fur then you’ll be dealing with a cat that has never been wet other than through its own choice or by being caught out in the rain.  Your cat will not be happy with you if you decide to give it a bath, but needs must.

You’ll need cat shampoo (human shampoo will irritate their skin because it is too harsh), a big bowl of water (a bucket is normally too narrow) or sink filled with about four or five inches of warm (not hot) water and a towel spread out on the floor next to you.   You’ll also be well advised to wear long sleeves that you don’t mind getting wet, and perhaps lightweight gardening gloves (you are going to get scratched).  Finally, make sure your showerhead will reach the sink or bowl, or use a showerhead attachment that you can fit to the sink’s taps.  

Speak softly to your cat and make soothing sounds whilst you put it in the water.  You may need a second person to help you as the cat will try to use their legs to stick to the sides of the sink/bowl rather than touch the water.  If your cat likes treats, offer some and see if that will distract them – it might not.  

The key is to get this task done quickly and efficiently to minimise distress to your cat.  Put a little bit of shampoo onto your cat’s body (either the bit that needs it or all over, depending on why you’re bathing your cat in the first place). Don’t put it on their head if you can avoid it – and if you must use it on your cat’s head then make sure it doesn’t go in its eyes or ears. Rinse the shampoo out with the showerhead (again, take care not to allow the shampoo to get in the cat’s eyes or ears), then remove your cat from the water and put it straight onto the towel.  Wrap the towel around the cat to keep it in place and use it to gently rub the cat dry.  

If you have more than one cat and have for some reason had to bath both cats, never try to bath them together. Unfortunately the second cat will be harder to catch and bath because it will have seen what happened to the first cat and do everything in its power to avoid the same fate. After the cats have been bathed, they will smell different and they might fight. Use the same towel to dry both cats, and keep them separated until they have had chance to lick themselves properly.  

Don’t let your cats go outside until they are completely dry or they will be very uncomfortable.  

Finally, pour yourself a glass of wine, apply plasters where needed and fervently hope that you’ll never have to go through it all again.